Bluebird Is Breaking
by Nariena
Summary: When Cless takes longer than expected to return, something unthinkable happens. A victim must now learn to cope with reality. ClessChester
1. Remembrance

Disclaimer: Tales of Phantasia and all her characters belong to Namco. The bluebird comparison is credited to Morrosseth.

Pairing: Cless x Chester

Warnings: Rape, Spoilers, Shounen-ai

**A/N:** Dedicated to my Major. An odd one to dedicate, but you seemed to like the first chapter a lot. So there. Merry Christmas

**Bluebird Is Breaking**

Chapter 1: Remembrance

Written by Nariena

August 12, 2007

He remembered that night all too well. The night he'd been broken like a twig beneath a stallion's hooves.

He remembered those wild, roaming hands; the muffled gasps and moans; the unbelievable pain.

His body still ached, and he still remembered.

The wind had howled mercilessly that night, sympathetic to his plight.

Lightning had crashed and thunder exploded, but he could still hear hot breath against his ear.

Still he could hear his intruder's laugh, horrendous and mocking, chilling him to his core.

He still dreamed of the night.

He dreamed of his terror, his fear, his helplessness.

And for that he hated himself.

Though he told himself he'd been weak and barely conscious, he hated that his hands, struggling to stave the intruder off, had been so easily brushed aside.

He loathed how easily he'd been pinned to the ground, hands held high above his head.

He needed to find an excuse for his weakness, or else he deserved it, and he'd hate himself more.

More than anything, he was ashamed. He was guilty. Scared.

It was all his fault.

He should have died.

He remembered how it had started as a battle. But then, when he looked into his enemy's eyes, it became so much more.

They'd been filled with such strong emotions. Animalistic. Violent. Lustful.

And he'd been so scared.

Those cold blue eyes had gleamed with such intensity.

His mind had urged him to turn tails and run. But he'd become so weak, after fighting for so long….

Trapped under that terrifying gaze, he froze, feet rooted to the spot.

Predator pounced upon prey.

He found himself pinned underneath his opponent's larger frame, and he struggled to wriggle free.

It was no use. His hands were easily batted away, and pinned down above his head.

And then came that laugh. That taunting, chilling laugh.

A shiver shot up his spine, but he managed a low growl.

He still had the sense in him to glare.

He remembered how the man's hands would flit across his thighs every so often, and how his breath had hitched in his throat.

He remembered how he'd wanted to throw up after the man had violently claimed his lips.

He remembered how the man had forced him to shed his clothing, and how, afterwards, it had seemed that the man had bitten every single inch of his body.

It had made him feel sick, and so he'd pleaded for the man to stop, to let him go, to just kill him.

The pleas went to deaf ears, and the man just shook his head. He bent down to whisper to him, speaking for the first time.

"You're mine."

He froze up again, a wave of fear coursing through his veins.

Until that moment, he'd been hoping that the man would stop, find him inadequate, or just decide to kill him.

Apparently he'd have none of that.

He could just barely hear the tumbling of rocks over the thumping of his own heart, as the man effortlessly spread his tired legs apart.

_Thump, thump, thump…._

It was pounding in his ears, so loudly that he wondered if the man could hear it above him, facedown in the dirt.

He let out a cry of pain as the man thrust into him for the first time.

And so began a night that he would never forget, however much he wished to.

That night, when he'd been taken, marked, broken in. And it had all been too easy.

Indeed, the title of Demon Lord well suited this man.

For as the Demon Lord's sole words echoed through his mind…

"_You're mine."_

… Chester Barklight believed them.


	2. Realization

Disclaimer: Tales of Phantasia and all her characters belong to Namco. The bluebird comparison is credited to Morrosseth.

Pairing: Cless x Chester

Warnings: Rape, Spoilers, Shounen-ai

**Bluebird Is Breaking**

Chapter 2: Realization

Written by Nariena

October 2, 2007

He was no fool.

He knew, and he saw the signs.

And yet, he hadn't known _why_.

Morrison had known.

When asked, however, he would only shake his head and say that it was for Chester-- and Chester _only_-- to tell.

Now, he was almost glad for that.

As a particularly fake archer drifted by, he couldn't help but pity him.

The poor thing had had his parents and only sister taken away, his best friend had left him twice, and now this?

Despite the fact that touch would no doubt do anything but rattle the archer, he longed to just hold him.

But it was best to stay away from such subjects,

It wasn't hard to see that the archer wasn't willing to discuss it.

He wondered if Chester would be willing to talk about it. Then he stopped himself, because he already knew the answer.

He remembered how he'd found out.

How, little by little, he'd pieced it all together.

How, little by little, he'd watched the archer break.

When he'd first been able to take a good look at the archer, he'd felt sick.

There had been scratches lining his otherwise bloody and bruised back.

The archer's neck had made him feel strangely nauseous, as if, seeing it then, he'd subconsciously realized what had gone on that dreary day.

His neck had been covered in bite marks.

Thinking back on it now, he had to wonder why he'd never realized that, in a fight, the Demon Lord would never resort to biting and scratching.

Maybe he just hadn't wanted to believe it.

He couldn't blame himself for not wanting to.

For the next thing he saw was perhaps the most heartbreaking of all.

The archer's eyes had flickered open.

First, they'd shown pure, undiluted panic.

It was easy for anyone to see he'd been scared.

The air had hung at that moment, as if waiting for him to scream.

Not a sound had escaped his lips even after the fear had subsided, but his eyes had indeed changed.

Despair, hope, pain, helplessness, fear again-- all flashed in those slate depths at once.

Finally, they'd turned to a heart-wrenching sort of acceptance.

He never wanted to see that archer like that again, typically cold eyes bearing his soul to the world.

A pity, then, that it was in such a state they stayed, even after the journey.

And so the swordsman never looked directly into the archer's eyes again, and nothing changed.

Even without looking him in the eye, however, he could still see that unspeakable despair.

It was in the defeated way he moved; in the long silence that consumed the both of them.

It was in his distraction during battle. It was in his newly formed paranoia, and it was most definitely in his lack of trust.

It seemed he never let his guard down, refusing to even sleep; he always volunteered for night watch, and, if refused, he'd go out and train.

The others always dismissed it as a simple desire to be useful, but Cless didn't buy it.

He disappeared for hours, those nights.

In the rare event that the group did manage to get him to sleep, he tossed and turned fitfully.

Often, feverish mumbles could be heard, pleading and begging in their slurred flow.

Though evidence was still pointing to that same sickening scenario, Cless refused to believe it.

Things had only become worse after they'd met Suzu.

Upon entering the sauna, he'd been treated to another view of Chester's back, now littered with scars.

He'd disguised concern with compliments that night, and received but a small smile in return.

It hadn't been a real smile, he reminded himself.

They never were, always plastic and empty.

But he'd felt a fraction better, if only for a little while.

He'd always told himself that, maybe, the archer was saving real smiles for after the final battle, when everything was peaceful again.

But, even after, he never smiled one of his old, shining smiles that the swordsman so dearly missed.

And peace never returned.

Dhaos has been put to rest.

They had both gotten their revenge.

But, for the archer, nothing had really changed.

Now, as unwilling as he was, with a mechanical Chester drifting in and out of view, he had no choice but to believe.

Chester had been raped.

He realized now that nothing would change.

The bluebird's wings had been broken…

… And he might never fly again.


	3. Repentance

Disclaimer: Tales of Phantasia and all her characters belong to Namco. The bluebird comparison is credited to Morrosseth.

Pairing: Cless x Chester

Warnings: Rape, Spoilers, Shounen-ai

**Bluebird Is Breaking**

Chapter 3: Repentance

Written by Nariena

December 10, 2007

He'd tried to think of something.

Something that he could do to ease the pain.

The pain that _he himself_ had caused.

The guilt had plagued him ever since he'd seen the archer's face.

A face clouded in fear, in hurt, and in hatred.

Hatred that was directed towards _him_. Hatred that _he_ had evoked.

It had made him sick, to think hat he'd done this.

This act that had obliterated any small scrap of hope the archer had felt.

Hope that had been dangling on a thread, about to break off at any point.

He'd been the final straw.

He'd snapped the archer's hope like a twig.

He'd completely destroyed it.

The next time he saw the archer, he couldn't help but recall vividly that terrible night.

That night, he'd somehow lost control.

Control that would have saved the archer had it been kept.

Every detail passed through his mind.

The way the archer had shuddered under his touch.

The way he'd begged to be killed.

The next time he saw the archer, a fight was inevitable.

It would have happened one way or the other.

Yet why had he been so unprepared to see him?

Had the dam he'd built up in his mind broken?

Was the guilt flowing in now?

Was he going to drown in this guilt?

His mind elsewhere, the battle had begun.

His opponents had all attacked mercilessly.

All, except for the archer.

Eyes wide with nervous revenge, the archer stood to attack for the first time.

Movements slowed by hesitation, the archer would have had no time to dodge the attack he had launched.

He'd purposely missed.

As if realizing this, the archer's face had twisted into some strange, hopeless fury.

The archer let loose his arrow.

It was then that he made one of the toughest decisions of his life.

Win, or lose?

Life, or death?

His planet, or this broken young archer that captivated him so-- which would he save?

In a split second, his mind was made up.

The arrow hit strong and true.

Something long ago banished crept across his senses.

It wasn't pain.

He felt none at all.

Not yet.

The swordsman rushed in for an attack.

What was this feeling, if not pain?

_Slash, slash, slash._

All three had hit, though none had been critical.

Still no pain.

Only that strange feeling. Was it shame?

He _had_ just betrayed his planet.

Another attack, this time magic from the half-elf.

And it _was_ true that he was ashamed of what he'd done to the archer.

The magic hit in a flash of magnificent light.

Just a hint of pain now, as he grew closer to his conclusion.

But, no, it was not shame.

He was far above shame by now.

The summoner was next in line, beginning his chant.

He would not feel shame when his life was the cost.

The summoner kept chanting.

He looked to the spirit, forming within a glowing light.

And he knew.

Release. It was sweet release.

Simply, but not simply after all, it was just release.

The spirit attacked, but his mind was still elsewhere.

He, the Demon Lord, was capable of earning release?

It was strange….

The magic hit, and he was sure.

Dhaos, supposed savior of Derris-Kharlan, was now free of the regret he'd felt for something he'd done to a foolish human.

It was ridiculous, this idea, but he was sure of it.

Now, there was only one thing left to do.

One quick mouth of an apology to the foolish young archer…

… And then it was time to die.


	4. Rain

Disclaimer: Tales of Phantasia and all her characters belong to Namco. The bluebird comparison is credited to Morrosseth.

Pairing: Cless x Chester

Warnings: Rape, Spoilers, Shounen-ai

**Bluebird Is Breaking**

Epilogue: Rain

Written by Nariena

December 10, 2007

When he'd woken up, Cless had decided that it was just one of those days.

One of those days, when the weather was dreary and no one was around and Chester was especially depressed.

He'd spent the whole morning pondering over the archer, and probably most of the afternoon about what he should say.

Usually Mint was best at these sorts of things, but she'd gone off with Morrison to get more wood.

They'd run out, after managing to rebuild quite a large portion of Totus.

It wasn't a professional job by any means, but they were doing pretty well with the few volunteers from Euclid they had.

So, now that Mint was gone for who knew how long, Cless felt that it was his duty to cheer Chester up, or at least try.

It was true that he had no clue what he wanted to say.

But it was also true that Cless was determined. And when Cless was determined to do something, then by Martel, he'd get it done.

First off, however, he needed to find Chester.

Cless hadn't seen him all day, so he assumed Chester was outside.

The only problem was that it was raining. Hard.

Oh, well. No harm in checking, he supposed.

With that, he exited the building, to be near soaked through after one minute of searching.

Worry outweighing the chill, he pressed on through the downpour.

After what seemed like forever, a figure seemed to appear, stoic against what little light there was.

By then, he figured it must have been getting late.

Chester must have been out for quite a long time.

Cless stepped towards the figure cautiously, calling out.

"Chester? Are you alright?"

When there was no response, he thought for a moment that his voice had been lost to the sound of the rain.

But then the archer turned his head, the picture of surprise.

Their eyes met for the first time in months.

Cless' heart sank. Still the same.

He could have sworn he'd seen a tear roll down Chester''s cheek as he lowered his head.

He hoped that it was just the rain.

The archer shook his head, turning back around.

Now that he thought of it, what was Chester looking at, anyway?

Curious, Cless approached.

Putting a hand on Chester's shrugged shoulder, he squinted to see past the rain in front of him.

That couldn't be right. It seemed that they were just in front of the entrance into the catacombs where Dhaos had been sealed.

How had he managed to wander this far off?

"Why are you all the way out here, Chester?"

The archer seemed to stiffen under Cless' hand, but his gaze remained trained to the sky.

Cless mentally kicked himself. Wrong thing to ask.

Predictably, the archer didn't respond.

Well, _damn_, he thought. That was all he'd figured out.

Lost for words, the swordsman remained standing where he was.

But it was Chester that next did something unthinkable.

With lightning speed, he whirled around and clung to the swordsman for dear life.

Before Cless had time to react, Chester spoke, voice fearful against the wind.

"You know what happened."

The swordsman, still dumbstruck, nodded, and the archer averted his gaze.

"I knew it."

A drawn-out silence passed between them, as the swordsman searched for the right words to say.

"I still love you, you know."

It was the first thing that came to mind.

It was almost painfully true.

"How can you say that? I'm-- I--"

Cless silenced him, putting a finger to his lips.

"You're you, Chester. No matter what happens."

"You don't know anything, do you?"  
Looking at him in contempt, he went to shove the swordsman away.

As he turned away, Cless caught his arm.

"Let go."

"No."

"I said, let go!"

"And I said no."

It was then that an idea popped into Cless' mind.

Something that his mother had taught him, long ago.

Without another word, he pulled the archer back into his arms.

His hands found their way to the archer's wrists.

Chester flinched, fear taking over.

Right away, memories flooded into his mind.

He suddenly felt weak, and couldn't help but stutter.

"C-Cless! What are you--?!"

From behind, Cless cut him off.

"Shh. Just close your eyes and listen."

Hesitantly, ever so hesitantly, Chester obeyed.

As time passed, the archer's heartbeat slowed to a normal pace, and he relaxed more and more into Cless' hold.

It was oddly soothing, hearing the rain's pitter-patter all around.

And he found a strange comfort in feeling Cless behind him.

It was this way that they stayed for quite some time.

Chester stood still, feeling and listening.

Cless was the tower, protecting him.

As the rain's chill, previously forgotten, began to settle in, they broke apart.

Cless suggested they head back.

Chester smiled.

It was still just one of those days, Cless decided then.

But now it was one of _those_ days.

One of _those_ days, when the weather was dreary and no one was around and Chester had finally _smiled_.

And though the scars would always remain, maybe, just maybe, this bluebird would fly again…

… For there, in his infinite darkness, he saw the sun. And he was healed.

- FIN -


End file.
